The English language is filled with clichés

many of which tend to fall on deaf ears:

some might even make a little sense

while others make no sense at all

and where it stops nobody knows

the grass is always greener on the other side

you’ll cut off your nose to spite your face

I love you but we’re strangers when we meet

especially when my wife is with me

what goes around comes around

he threw himself at her feet

she stormed out of the room

with her nose up in the air

what you see is what you get

you get what you pay for

what happens in Vegas…

long ago and far away

we weren’t allowed to do that when we were your age

that is above my pay grade

if a frog had wings he wouldn’t have to bump his butt

when pigs fly

once in a blue moon

once in a lifetime

you can’t have your cake and eat it, too

it’s hotter than a mother-in-law’s tongue

He’s so clumsy he’d trip over a cordless phone.

He’s about as handy as a back pocket on a shirt.

That’s about as useful as a trap door on a canoe.

He couldn’t carry a tune if he had a bucket with a lid on it.

She was so tall she could hunt geese with a rake.

She was so tall if she fell down she would be halfway home.

He was so fat it was easier to go over top of him than around him.

It happened faster than a knife fight in a phone booth.

NO!! I AM NOT FALLING ASLEEP!! I was just checking for holes in my eyelids.

Somebody beat him with the ugly stick.

I’ll knock you so hard you’ll see tomorrow today.

Dumb as a bucket of rocks.

If wishes were horses, then beggars would ride